Do You Ever Want a World Revolving Button...

which will make the "world revolve around you" and that you can push to fit the current situation more easily into your life? One that makes the world stop and get out of the way for just a moment or at least function as you need it?

Note: I realize that current mothers may empathize; others may laugh at me; future mothers may not ought to read. :)

I can think of a couple of moments I have wished for one during this adventure called "motherhood". One such incident occurred Friday (I have recorded a more humorous version on the family blog but just wanted to have an account of the physical, mental, and emotional onslaught here). In mere seconds, my world was shaken up like a snowglobe. The what-ifs are too much to even allow to cross the landscape of my brain so we won't go there. I am just going to catalog the actual happenings and fill-in the emotional stir-craziness.

1) Colton busted chin on poolside edge.

I saw blood pouring from his face but couldn't tell quite from where it was coming: think from speech stuff (have we lost a tongue, teeth, damaged lips, nerves, etc. will we eat or speak normally --knew no concussion because walking, talking, crying, screaming, etc.

2) He fights me putting pressure with cloth to stop bleeding. The physical strength of my 4 year old is astounding especially when adrenaline is aiding him!

3) We execute getting in car and buckled to go to doc. The far back seat is so far away and he is so little and I just want to hold him. Alas, I must drive. Outside -Externally calm for him. Know he will be fine. Inside crying and shaking. Know more that he is in pain and is scared which causes me pain. Thanking God we are with friends and I can leave my eldest and the dive sticks, bag, and Hot Wheels track floating in pool and just get a move on!

4) I drive 25 miles an hour out of the neighborhood reminding myself to be safe for a wreck would not help. Part of the button's job would be to transform my Pilot into something likened to the Batmobile with 4 (ok--maybe 10) sirens, wings, and Go-go-gadget boosters on it communicating to the world to move over, be 2 minutes late to their lunch appointments and meetings-- I mean my child is bleeding!-- or aid me in propelling us around and over them.

5) All the radio stations are talking. He chooses and 'keeps' "Bust a Move". I think later how that song will no longer remind me of Jr. High dances or sleepovers.

6) There are traffic lights that have turned red. Seriously! Red right now? "Mom-mobile" and button where are you?!?!?!?! Externally calm and breathing so as not to exacerbate child's anxiety. Checking rearview mirror to see if the multiple band-aids are helping at all? Reassure him he is fine. Reassure myself.

7) We get to doctor and must wait for her to finish a well check in the next room. Want that kid to hurry up and do all the developmental standing on one foot etc. Get it done! I mean my child is now in my lap but still BLEEDING!

8) Doc tells Colton she will be right back to wash his chin. We guess what we think the "washer" will look like -he guesses a water hose; i guess a water gun. We talk about how it might spray us and he decides he might should close his eyes. I think that is a great idea because you don't want to see the rest either there buddy!

9) We are freezing in our swimsuits so I go get his clothes out of the car and at least change him into something dry and warm. I am thanking God for Cow Appreciation days for I would not have a change of clothes otherwise. We don't normally take clothes with us to swim but were planning to go to the Chick afterwards.

10) Get moved into room for cleaning and stitching. Take beach towel for covering eyes. Thankful to God we were at pool and have beach towel to use.

11) Holding his arms and legs while Doctor works and assistant holds beach towel in place. Get a little teary-eyed as he cries and moans but is so brave. SOOOO thankful for that beach towel that he can't see syringes, needles, or MY FACE!

12) Tell him a story of the 5 brothers (5 fingers - we make up stories about them often) to calm & distract. This one is about them playing with slot cars, jumping on Spider Jumps, and racing go-carts. wondering if any of it is making sense - feeling weight of physical hold on him, and mental and emotional hold on myself.

13) It is done. We go back to friend's house. Neither one of us is hungry and it is 3 hours past lunch time! After about 30 minutes feel like my sugar crashes, need food immediately! Adrenaline has ceased to help! Eat! He comes and says he is hungry now. Feed him. Leave! All of a sudden feel like I could sleep for days.

14) Hold breath the rest of afternoon that he is going to hit it again. Keep reminding him to be easy and gentle. Discover the knots that have formed in my stomach and shoulders. Fight the desire to be with him in every room at every second.

15) Get him some stuff from pharmacy, put in on, give it to him, and get him in bed. Can't sleep; stomach now yelling at me. Check on him multiple times to be sure he is not on it. Physically spent. Emotionally and mentally wrenched but can't get comfortable much less nod off.